I Admit, I Don't Know

I don't trust you
I don't understand you
I'm scared of you
I don't know you
Maybe because you don't know
Yourself;
Who are you?
What do you feel deep within your layers of defense
You seem to be screaming
"No one get too close!" 
Perhaps you'll feel
Your own pain, sorrow, fears and loss.
All I know about you
Is that you're hurting
But do you know?
I don't know if you do and I'm scared to find out
Because deep beyond my mind
I love you
Even though I haven't managed
The pain strangling my heart.
And I don't know what to do
With my anger and love
For you.
---
written 2013