It’s Okay

It’s alright to think

It’s okay to doubt

It’s normal to question

What life’s all about

It's alright to feel
It’s okay to cry

It’s normal to fear

That someone might die.

It’s alright to wonder

It’s okay to muse 

It’s normal to disagree

When you cannot choose.

It’s alright to run

It’s okay to hide

When it’s hard to believe

That G-d’s on your side.

It’s normal to feel

Anger and pain

But accept G-d’s actions

As a message not in vain.

---

written 2006

Grant Me Another Chance

It strikes me like a lightning bolt

It's clear like a cloudless sky

It's emptiness, it's loneliness

So strange

Tear drops rain down on me

I too begin to cry

It dawns on me- this realization

I've pushed you all away

I thought I didn't need you

I was hoping for much more

I didn't care

To be your friend

Drenched through, exhausted

I search my heart for clues

It strikes me and it hurts

I've been lost inside myself

I want another chance

I want to make amends

I want to show you I do care

I miss you as my friend

---

written 2012

Pen of the Heart

I've missed you

Pen and paper

I miss that hidden place

Where I can be whatever

My chance to escape

Thoughts I didn't know I had

Appear now on my page

I've longed to write

To capture them

Without, I feel misplaced

No wonder now I'm writing

It's taken far too long

I've found a scrap of paper

For my heart to write its song

---

written 2012

Lost In Space

I'm slowing down, forgetting
Why I've come down this path
I've forgotten where I'm going
What is it that I need
I'm distracted by all these colors
That my eyes seem forced to see
I'm confused by my dreaming
Of what I think I want
I'm so torn by my fantasy
How can I not play along
But I manage to stop completely
I attempt to clear my mind
I start to wonder what happened
I've been possessed from inside
Now where should I go
How can I get back my lost time
I'm struck with my guilt
Reality does not rewind
---
written 2011

Once Upon A Time

I wonder what time can do

To my memories of you

Can it pull you out from my heart

Make me really forget?

I wouldn't even miss you

If I'd forget who you are

I wouldn't even know you

My heart from yours, so far

I wouldn't think to thank you

As I use your advice you gave

I wouldn't even know it's yours

If time can take memories away

So I write as I do wonder

As I fear it may indeed

I'll write what I remember

So time cannot succeed

---

written 2011

A Fragile Gift

With bows and ribbon

I'll make for you

A special gift of love

Filled with hugs and kisses

And warmth

I'll wait for you to open it

To smile, to feel some joy

To remember that I haven't forgotten

I'll wait for you to wrap some up

And send your love to me

I'll treasure it

Filling up my heart

I'll wait for it to comfort me

To help me smile, feel some joy

And to remember 

You haven't forgotten either

---

written 2011

A Dream In My Heart

I want to write

But I am scared

To let you know

What I have feared

I want to share

My secrets and fears

But I never built trust

To treasure my tears

I want to hug you

Hold you tight

But I don’t know how

To do it right

I want to thank you

For all you’ve done

But I assume it’s silly

You might make fun

I want to sing

Without being heard

As much as that seems

Completely absurd

I want to dance

But I’ve got two left feet

Please don’t compare me

Or I will retreat

I want to play

Spend time with you

But maybe you’re busy

With better things to do

I want to say

I love you

But it hurts to reveal

What I know is true

I always dream

Of how I will be

When nothing will scare me

When I will be free

I believe some day I will

Soar through the sky

I shan’t be scared

As you watch me fly high

---

written 2003

Shine Your Light

Days have past

Weeks gone by

Yet memories stay strong

I remember

Cannot forget

The pain lasts so long

To watch him go

To disappear

Sends arrows through my heart

To lose control

To lose belief

Tears my soul apart

To see his picture

To hear his name

Stirs a tiny spark of hope

To give that smile

Rebuild belief

Helps me now to cope

To share a joke

A loving word

Is sharing who he was-

Spreading joy

Sincerely love

Only just because

A loyal friend

A devoted mate

The best Zeide to me

His eyes would sparkle

His smile so real

That’s how I want to be

I remember his words

Just be your best

In everything you do

So I’ll continue

Spreading light

Zeide, I’ll be just like you

---

written 2004

Secret Admirer

I'm standing now

At a distance

You're in the corner of my eye

I watch you walk by

And I wonder

What is it that you think of

When you find me watching you

What is it that you feel then

When you turn to see me gaze

I'm standing now

Behind you

Just waiting for your smile

Just waiting for you to notice me

To approach me and say hi

And as I wait, I wonder

What is it that you thought of

When you wished to be noticed

To wait shyly at the side

And as I wonder

I suddenly notice you

In the corner of my eye

So I look up in surprise

I find you gazing at me mischievously 

A smile playing on your lips

---

written 2005

My Magic Wand

I'd wave it in the air

Wistfully envisioning a wonderful place

And poof-

Glistening sparkles blind my eyes

No need to stress, to work so hard

My magical wand convinces me

Now lost in empty bliss

Suffocating in a world of golden dust

Oh Magic Wand!

Refusing to let go

I wave it frantically

And poof-

Sandy speckles replace golden dust

I squint, loosen my grip

My wand lays limp in hand

Oh Magic Wand!

---

written 2011